Month: April 2025

It’s a trick question loll.

Technically? Not even a question per se, but here’s My reason(s) for saying it.

1. You don’t actually know Me/see Me/Connect with Me IRL. So I remain but a “Conceptual Person” to You in Your IRL-Life, DR. Depending on the details – are You an Adult? Are You a Child? F#ck if I know! – Your TECH would process this data differently. [N: Kids! This is the Rule… and until You physically reach legal Adulthood status? There are No Exceptions to this Rule]

2. Even if You do know/see/Connect with Me IRL? You shouldn’t air-quotes ‘Trust Me’… at least, not yet. Not until You’ve acquired some mutual Experience data as We “hang out” with Each Other. The more data You acquire that Your TECH evaluates as “positive” – AKA “not questionable or suspicious” – the increased likelihood that You will be able to Trust Me, sooner or later.

3. I have a Theory [N: as yet an Unproven Theory] that legit TABIs – Trusted Adult(s) with Bad Intent – will pretend to be Safe. Meaning, TABIs act like a “wolf in sheep’s clothing. And if I – transform, usually suddenly if You are paying attention – am now a TABI? Imma pretend Everything is Fine. Imma act like Everything is Cool. Nothing to See, here.

So Me? I insist from the get-go, DR: I Am Not Safe, no matter how I look to You, physically/externally. No matter where We Connect – at daycare, at the grocery store, at Sunday church – and no matter Who I Am IRL – Brother-In-Law, Niece, Teacher, Doctor, Therapist, Priest, Policeman, Ice Cream Truck Driver-Guy, Hot Guy on the football team that goes to My High School, etc. etc.

For You, DR? AKA Mom? Or Dad? Watch My steps. Watch My movements. Acquire the IRL Experience data – and keep on acquiring it, infinity. Why? Because You only get one shot at this whole “Protecting the Children” thing.

“Never go against a Sicilian when Death is on the Line…” [N: PASSION “bwahaHAHAHA”]

I Never take chances, DR. I Always weigh Experience data over Conceptual data, in literally any circumstance or situation.

“Never go against Me when ‘Death of My Kid’ is on the line…”

You, DR, are speaking here. You are firing a warning shot over the bow, to Me & to Everybody Else. Full Stop.

. . .

Conner’s Comments: Interestingly, this scene between Wesley AKA The Black Pirate and Vizzini is an excellent visual of TECH falling into a Rabbit Hole. Society refers to this as “analysis paralysis”… and this scene is KEY because it cautions the Watcher that if You ignore Equilibrium? Somebody’s gonna end up Dead. And Vizzini’s “Look over there!” ploy? Distraction. Classic loll.

I’m smarter than You are giving Me credit for. But whatev – there is No Test, so technically I don’t seek credit from You… or Anybody Else, for that matter.

Here’s the missing pieces, DR. The blanks in the MadLibs.

You – from the outside – don’t see the billions of Files inside My Invisible Library. You only ‘see’ what books I “let You check out.” You only acquire the data – about Me, personally, and My IRL Life – that I Consent to reveal to You. And after “getting burned” enough times? I finally figured out – after many proverbial bricks to the head – to quit sticking My fingers into the flame. Or even… to not turn the pilot on. Or sometimes even? To stay outta the f#cking Kitchen.

But all those are details that may or may not apply.. until 1) I Connect with You, and 2) I recognize the Context of the situation.

Here’s a tip, DR: Keep It To Yourself.

This means that when I am out & about Connecting with any Other Person – AKA ‘Random Human Beings’ or any variety or classification – If I am walking down the street & happen to catch a glance of a woman walking towards Me in the other direction… and she has got “an awesome set of tits”… I’m just gonna smile at Her. [N: assuming She Herself consents to that connection by giving Me eye-to-eye contact] Otherwise? I’m gonna look down at the ground as I walk by, a smile on My face because I am imagining burying My face in those jugs – and doing a motorboat – and none of these thoughts hafta be expressed externally. Why? Because first & foremost? “Self- Preservation.”

I only care about Myself, so the last thing I am gonna do is give any OP air-quotes ‘Proof’ that I am checking out Your tits! DUh. [N: I’m not a total idiot]

That’s probably Why I am such “a Happy Person” by a Reasonable Observing Person’s standards: I don’t willingly give Anybody enough rope to hang Me with. So.. Win-Win!

I recall a joke from ages ago, where this old Lady goes to the Doctor. As She is Connecting – PASSION is present, clearly – She says to the Doc, “I’ve been farting this entire time, but You can’t hear it & You can’t smell them!” And the Doctor just smiles – probably while looking down momentarily – and He leans over and does his Doctor-y magic… and all of sudden? The Lady is like, “WTF is that horrible smell?!”

Because the Doc just did something to Her sinuses that were obviously clogged or something – the Lady’s own words gave the Doc a clue as to “where to look” – and then the Doc says, “Now, let’s take a look at Your hearing…”

. . .

And that’s why this joke is so funny to Me loll. Even recalling it now – as I type this Story for You – it brings a smile to My face.

But the Money Shot? It wasn’t what the old Lady was saying or doing… it was what the Doctor Himself was saying & doing.

Could He have “shamed” Her? Yes. But… He chose to do something else.

Could He have lost his patience, and just did his Doctor “wham bam thank You Ma’am” stuff on her? Yes. But… he chose to do something else.

Could He have tried to Boss her, critique her behavior, saying something like “You shouldn’t just fart whenever You want… what will Other People think/say?” Sure He could have… but he didn’t.

Here’s the point I’m trying to make: I always have a choice. I always have options in how I respond. The external World will try its damnedest to keep Me agitated, triggered, upset, and traumatized – and for awhile? I’ll jump into a Rabbit Hole so I can smooth off the rough edges – but after I’ve expressed out all these feelings? Imma re-engage… and tweak My Own process.

One last thing: I am known the World over by My smile. It’s the first thing People see, when We Connect loll.

PSA: There are a Lot of Stupid People in this World.

No, really! Not any of Your People, DR. Not in My Herd, either. Well.. I take that back: I do have a few Stupid ones, skulking around the edges. I toss them a bone every so often, because I feel sorry for them.

They are gonna feel really stupid later on, in Hindsight.

But hey! I “did My part.” I paid My dues. I got My nose bloodied, a black eye or two… and now? In Current Day? I am way more discriminating – AKA “selective” – about whom I choose to waste My limited time on, IRL.

And I’m allowed to decide this, for Myself. I am the Boss of Myself, and there’s No Test. And Nobody ever got fired for saying “I don’t know.” [N: that’s a trick for the Smart People – if You find Yourself in a toxic work environment, especially after a long time of “picking up everybody else’s slack?” Just start acting dumb. [N: that way they leave You in peace while You look for Your next job loll] “When in Rome…”

Here’s another example of Stupid: this saying, in the title of this Story. This doesn’t mean My decision-making is flawed; I have to make mistakes to learn anything relevant in My Own Life – which I can’t learn by osmosis. But what Stupid Does is “open My mouth & reveal” that I, personally, lack the same data in My Files as You have in Your Files, DR… but instead of letting You Plant Seeds for Me, and Me quietly percolate on them for awhile? Imma open My big f#cking mouth & attack” You. For daring to think differently than Me. For daring to create variances in TECH’s data – because that sh#t hurts My SB. [N: “growing pains”] And any @$$hole Who “hurts Me” in any way, shape or form – regardless of the air-quotes ‘reason’ – is gonna get their @$$ kicked.

You may think it’s PASSION that is being triggered, but No: It’s TECH being triggered here. PASSION is just the heavy, holding the proverbial bag. PASSION is just the one that starts punching & kicking & screaming & fighting. But TECH started it. Why? Because the Other Person is giving Me – TECH, specifically – more data that is “foreign” to My current understanding of this Concept that We (You & Me) are talking about, right now. So it’s technically not a “difference of opinion…” it’s a difference of the data in Our Files that’s causing the conflict.

. . .

Conner’s Comments: Everything I explain here, DR? Makes sense to Me, in My Own SB. If You “think about it” differently? You are Right. [N: AKA Not Wrong] I’m merely trying to give You a starting point – similar to Franklin Covey time management class. The FCTM Folks taught Me how their cool time management binder was intended to be used – Conceptually – and then cut Me loose at the end of the class: “Use this binder however You want. Make it Your Own.” You won’t hurt My feelings, I swear! [N: and as You know, I have zero problems swearing loll] And one more thing: Your personal Experience data, DR? That data – when You share it – is still sort of Conceptual data to Me. [N: i.e. it didn’t happen to Me, firsthand]

I don’t think You are Stupid, DR. I think You are… close-minded.

As a Superfan of South Korea drama shows, SK [N: the IRL country] is “on My radar.” I notice, when stuff happens – AKA News articles come out/are posted on the Internet, or a televised report or some such nonsense – that the subject involves South Korea.

TECH has a few data points acquired already, collected in the Files.

1. South Korea’s Parents have an extreme focus on Education.
2. South Korea’s Students are offing themselves in frightening numbers.

I’m sure there are more relevant details, but it’s My Story so I’ll cry if I want to. [N: wait a minute?! WTF, PASSION! Focus!!]

Ok My bad. Sowwy! Lemme continue.

Within these two data points? I add My own perspective: First, that Parents the world over believe – inaccurately – that the more schooling One obtains, the more “successful in Life” One is. And two? I have a lot of intimate, firsthand knowledge of “suicide” – having tried it once Myself, having known Loved Ones Who tried – and succeeded – in doing it Themselves, and hearing ‘third degree burn’ Stories – My Buddy told Me about Their Buddy Who’s son Shay offed Himself, by hanging Himself from the tree in the backyard of Their Family Home. If I recall the Story correctly? Mom found His body.

So yeah, I always notice, when the subject turns to suicide.

And sooner or later? Because this is “something interesting to Me, personally” I start to notice when the subject turns to suicide… but no verbal words are being spoken.

Because *Spoiler Alert!* the signs are definitely there. The Person in question, who is thinking about offing Themselves? They are giving off signals, 100 guaranteed! – but, if I’m not looking for those signals – if I’m too distracted with BS & “not paying attn” – Imma miss them. And once this OP is successful? It’s Game Over.

It would be like if I – a Parent of a small Child, who is totally dependent on Me, Dad, for His very Life – if I spend all this Kid’s formative years neglecting Him, ignoring Him, not paying attention or noticing His behaviors, expecting Him to just magically “pull Himself up by His bootstraps” and “Handle Things” – Why? Because I handled things when I was His age? Because I “turned out allright?” If it aint broke, Why fix it??

“Dude. It’s broke! You just can’t ‘see’ it!” smh

But as long as I claim ignorance? As long as I “stay busy” in My pursuit of My Priorities – working for the Man, earning/spending gobs of money, trying to get a bazillion “likes” on Insta – then Everything’s Gonna Be Allright! Right?!?

No. The Kids are definitely Not air-quotes ‘Allright.’

I read something somewhere recently that “New & Improved Parental Controls on Social Media” blah blah just came out blah blah and TECH almost broke My arm, patting Myself on the back. This is a TECH Rabbit Hole, thinking “process” & “structure” and “money thrown at the problem” is going to magically fix the “People Issues.” Total Rookie mistake, with disastrous consequences. [N: and I say that, knowing full-well PASSION *hates* the word ‘consequences’ literally in any Context]

You know Why Kids can’t use their f#cking bootstraps? Because We’ve cut off Their feet!! They have No feet, No boots, No nothing! And We Adults are running around, giving Ourselves blow-jobs because We are just “so f#cking proud of all the hard work We are doing!” We Care, amiright?!? This is Proof, right?? Right?!?

No. We don’t Care. That’s obvious. We aren’t Right… that’s obvious, too. And We – the external World – haven’t reached our “Tipping Point” with any of this, yet, because the Children’s dead bodies keep piling up. And They will continue to pile up, until Somebody, Somewhere, pulls their f#cking Head out of their own A$$ and starts Planting the Right f#cking Seeds for the Right People, so We can get to work Influencing this World – yes, this external One, mentioned a few seconds ago – in the Right. F#cking. Direction.

There is only One Direction to go. And You already know which direction, DR, when You’ve hit rock bottom.

F#CK.

. . .

Conner’s Comments: I can’t Save the World, and neither can You, DR. Free Will, eh? Yeah, FW is always the monkey in the wrench. But if You let TECH roll Your joint – TECH is All or Nothing, 24/7 – You are always just gonna keep being zoned out on that dirty mattress, looking for that next line of coke to take the edge off… and The World is Gonna Pass. You. By.

But hey! You do You, Buddy. I’m Not the Boss of You.

“First & Foremost? I Love You. I Love You More than Life Itself.”

“Do You Pi$$ Me Off most of the time? Yes. YES! A thousand Times, Yes!! But… I forgive You, always and forever.”

“Even though Your doing something, saying something that’s causing Me to feel a great deal of pain, either physically, emotionally.. whatev. Those detalis aren’t relevant.”

“But make No Mistake: Even though I will take this Secret to My grave? I will always Prioritize My Relationship with You, Kid… and don’t think for a minute, DR, that I don’t mean You – AKA “the Random Human Being reading this, right now, in this very moment” – because You’d be Wrong. I mean YOU, too. Blood-related?!? Pish-Posh. You go back in the Story far enough, wasn’t Adam’s Rib used to create Eve? Yeah, that.”

“I fashioned You in My Own image, eh? That’s the rumor, anyways. You won’t ever get any Proof because… *snaps fingers a couple times* what’s that saying? “Beliefs Don’t Require Proof”? Yeah, Imma guess that’s accurate.”

“Me? I only had 4 historian-type Guys – I call Them ‘My Besties’ – to work with at the time, to help document My Life Story… and Each from their Own individual perspective(s), You notice – which is Why some of these details conflict with some of the other details in The Book. I mean, “a Broken Clock is still right twice a day, amiright??” I should really come back for a Do-Over, now that Internet has been manifested… I could do some serious damage with this tool.. But  – and this is a big butt – don’t sign Me up for ‘getting crucified’ this time; that was by far the worst part of My visit smh.”

“This Book I left for You? It was meant to just ‘get You started’… I was hoping/Trusting that You would figure it all out. True, true – I was winging it, Myself, when I did all that moon, stars, creation business – but in My Own defense, I was still a creation Virgin at the time!?! cut Me some slack!” [N: You like how I threw in that whole ‘virgin’ AKA ‘first time having sex’ thing? that pure genius if I do say so Myself.. talked about “Planting a Seed” Muthaf#ckers!]

“And One More Thing: Take everything You see, everything You hear? Thomas? That Guy was onto something, TBH. [N: and see?? He, too, got stuck with OP’s labels] Take it with a grain of salt. Never forget: those other Human Beings? Also ‘Mere Mortals.’ Nobody knows what I know. It’s for Me to know, and You to find out loll.”

But whenever You find Yourself stuck in any Rabbit Holes or all other manner of f#cked up sh#t is happening to You IRL? Remember this Most Important Thing:

“It’s all Going to Be Okay. I Promise.”

. . .

Conner’s Comments: Everything is A Lesson. Literally, Everything. Either “I’m learning a lesson” -or- “I Am the lesson”… and some Other Person is learning it. But with all due respect, DR: don’t assign any of Your SB’s labels onto IRL Me. I hafta consent to that kind of stuff. And in this instance? I Do Not consent: I’m just *playing* God… that’s Why Folks call Me “a Playa.” **runs off cackling**

*mental grenade explodes*

“But-But-But Conner?! That’s Crazy Talk!?! “

Yes, DR, I agree with You. It Is air-quotes ‘Crazy Talk.’ All of My verbal speech is.

But – and this is a big butt – You think this because You, Friend, do not have any access to the inside of My head. You may not know, yet, why I am using these specific words in this specific order – those reasons are UNKN to You, and maybe always be TBH – but I am here to definitively state [N: for The Record] that there are reasons for literally everything I say out loud.

And You? It’s a matter of how good of a Guesser You are.

*boom*

I am exactly like a Child. No, I Am a Child. Children – as a Rule – start out PASSION-Primary [N: until the World starts f#cking Them all up AKA “Parents” usually] But this is what makes Me… “Special.” And No, there’s nothing wrong with acknowledging My Own strengths… it’s actually mandatory, because then “how would I accurately identify My Own weaknesses? How would I know “what I need to work on?” DUh.

But back to My Story.

A Buddy of Mines recently came to crash at My Sanctuary, as My Guest. Him, and his Son. [N: approximately age 7 yrs, for the Audience]

My Buddy is a total TECH-brainer, through and through. It’s aggravating as f#ck to Me, personally, but I’m guessing it’s because TECH-Primary Folks are drawn to Me because – internally, sub-consciously – They seek “Equilibrium.” They ‘feel’  & ‘see’ & ‘sense’ that They are unbalanced, somehow, and want to smooth out the rough edges. I totally get it.

But, it takes a lot of My energy, TBH, to interact with Them IRL. I do so, willingly, sure… but it still takes energy. Just like it takes money to keep the lights on around here.

BB2MS. again.

My Buddy is a behavioral “Know-It-All” so I’ve already figured out – through Trial & Error – just pummeling Him with Conceptual data does nothing to balance Him out. And so, I had to tweak My Own process and figure out a better way to allow Him to acquire the necessary data in such a way as to “trick” His SB. A way to get past His manifested roadblocks.

“I had to build a Better Mousetrap.”

A bunch of times, My Buddy’s Auto-Pilot kicks in, and TECH verbally “rejects” what I am communicating right now, but like a Good Chicken I “keep pecking at it.” Because My highest Priority is usually “the Relationship” so I will actively & with full awareness sacrifice other wants/desires to achieve My most important goal in that moment.

But here’s what Mike isn’t aware of… And here’s Why I’ve already “Won.”

I don’t say anything I say, out loud, because I need You to agree with it, DR. I say everything I say – and I do everything I do – for the Audience. If We (You & Me) are “out in Public” right now? You are not the only Watcher of My antics. You are not the only Listener of My Stories. The Entire World is Watching.

And so I know that when I say or do something, whoever is IRL-AKA-physically “Present” when I am doing or saying it? All the SBs within distance will acquire the data, automatically. It’s just My SB, functioning as designed.

I don’t need to know or care Who is Listening. Why? Because I know what I am saying & Why I am saying it… and I trust in the Universe enough to know that when You, specifically DR, need to ‘get’ it? You will… probably In Hindsight.

*BOOM*

. . .

Conner’s Comments: I can tell whenever I am Connecting with any OP, IRL, where on the Equilibrium spectrum They are, in Current Day. And then I know how to “deal with Them,” tweaking My Own process & gathering New mutually-acquired interpersonal relationship Experience data as We go along.

But in case You are wondering, DR, Why I don’t keep updating the Nomanclature page on this-AKA-My website? It’s because these terms aren’t relevant – unless You are reading the actual Story they pertain to. That part of the Story hasn’t been written yet. It’s potentially Context that “isn’t needed” and so I’ve learned not to let the cat outta the bag prematurely. Too many details ruins a good Story… and Me? I am All about the Storytelling.

There’s probably more than one thing – so, My use of ‘singular’ is a little misleading, maybe – but this number changes over Time, kinda like the tides change at the shore of the ocean. It’s… Nature. “Human Nature.” That’s My guess, anyways.

So, there’s one thing that’s been on the tippy top of My List for awhile now: I Hate Wasting Food. Specifically. Not the more general phrase – “looking at You, TECH!” – of “I hate food being wasted” because that’s just TECH manifesting a Rabbit Hole – it’s a waste of My (limited) Time to worry about the air-quotes ‘total global percentage of food waste’ because Why? Because I Don’t Care – I can’t do anything about Anybody Else’s behavior or choices, and if I go all Hamster-Wheel on it, Imma waste all My time/energy for other more important sh#t.

I Can’t Save the World: I’m Not God.

. . .

But – and this is a big butt – I can take care of Who I really only care about, which is “Me. Myself. I.” Again, TECH tries to proclaim, “I can only count on Myself!” Which, true… but only to a point. It Depends… on what My goal is at the time. So this Rule of “caring only about Myself” can change – there are Exceptions to literally every Rule, after all – depending on the circumstances. Depending on the IRL situation. Depending on… the Context.

Here’s an example pulled from My IRL-Life this past week.

My G/F Agnes recently manifested a Life-long dream: To buy a house. Agnes has verbalized this dream, on & off, for literal years & years. So when this cheese finally dropped [N: after hitting that f#cking lever over & over for infinity] Agnes’ train finally reached the end of that tunnel & now, in Current Day? Proud Homeowner!! Yayy, A. “So, so happy for You!! You deserve it! You ROCK!”

But this Story? It’s not about Agnes. It’s about Sonny.

Upon hiking it over to see Agnes’ new abode – it felt like seeing a newly-born Baby, tbh [N: PASSION was super thrilled at the “See New House” adventure, all the more so because of the ‘Connecting with My Herd’ detail], Agnes treated Us (Her & Me) to Korean BBQ. [N: PASSION Loves KBBQ – I’m guessing due in part to the excessive watching of SK drama shows… but also the food is super tasty, and fun to prepare: “cooking on a hot plate in the middle of the actual table]

I knew right away that Sonny is My Soulmate.

How did I know? By His behavior and his speech. [N: *Spoiler Alert!* that’s how I know stuff about Every Human Being on this planet loll] Sonny smiled, playfully bantered with Us, laughed at My jokes, frequently returned to Our table to “check on Us” – all the way from ‘first drink order’ to “do You want matcha ice cream or strawberry cheesecake ice cream for dessert?” – so Me? A million dopamine jolts during that entire meal.

So, we get to the End. [N: the end of consuming all the meat & pork belly & baby squid & stuff] There was still several pieces of cooked meat on the grill that neither Agnes or Myself could consume. [N: sure, I’m a Poor Person & always on the look-out for food… but I still have My Physical Body limits]

I know the air-quotes ‘Rules’ of Korean BBQ. They are the same rules as for AYCE Sushi joints. Officially: “No Taking A Doggie Bag.”

And yet – TECH knowing full-well what ‘the rules’ are – PASSION still asked the question:

“I don’t suppose I can take these leftovers with Me?” *smiles sweetly… or, conspiratorially* [N: It Depends loll]

Sonny returned My smile, and looked directly into My eyes. [N: a tell! I’m Connecting with PASSION!!] “Officially – emphasis on this spoken word – ‘No…’… BUT…”

And the rest of this discussion is off the record. I will reveal, however, as I was agonizing to Agnes how “I would Die” for a piece of foil… all-of-a-sudden Outta Nowhere? A small square of foil magically appeared at the very end of the table We were still seated at.

[N: PASSION – “It’s a KOREAN BBQ MIRACLE!?!]

Tons of dopamine jolts. Seriously.

. . .

Conner’s Comments: And DR? I know full well that a lot of Folks would consider tipping to be the air-quotes ‘appropriate’ method of expressing One’s Gratitude for a well-prepped/delivered meal. We (Me & Everybody Else) can Agree to Disagree. First off, I wasn’t paying the bill here. So (technically) this avenue of “showing My appreciation” was closed off to Me, personally. Tipping? That’s all fine & good – but it’s TECH’s way, not PASSION’s way. And in My Kitchen? PASSION gets the biggest piece of the pie.

There are quite the collection of sayings for this:

“Trying to corral the Kittens”

“The Blind Leading the Blind”

“DO as I Say, Not as I DO”

And – they all have something in common: Who, exactly, is speaking.

Imma give You the Answer, DR, but You know if You knew the answer before reading My Answer – that’s how fast Your SB jumps, after all –

So if You were ‘Right’ then Yayy! [N: I won’t know either way, if You are in fact lying to Me, so Imma assume You already knew the Answer on account You’ve been “paying attn”]

TECH. TECH is speaking here. What’s the clues? Well, the motivation is “trying to control Someone Else’s behavior.” That’s a big one. Also, observing through “tunnel vision” misses vital Context data, and this overabundance of the attitude, “I am Right 100% of the Time, so You – Mere Mortal, Pee-On, Kid – should listen to ME!!” [N: the word “should” is always a tell]

Whereever I am and no matter what I am doing? TECH thinks I am the Boss. That I Know Best. That I am “Large & In Charge.” Maybe because of the professional role I fill in Real Life – Teacher, Doctor, Coach, Nuclear Physicist, Priest, or the President of the United States – or because I know [N: because I went to school a bunch & have multiple degrees & junk] that I am “extremely well educated.”

Not So Fast.

You know that saying, “a Big Fish in a Small Pond”? It applies, here.

Here’s the thing about Conceptual data: It’s Great! – In Theory. It all makes perfect sense in My head!? How does it all go so horribly, horrifically Wrong all the time?!?

Imma tell You Why, DR. It never works according to what TECH thinks & expects, because it usually involves Other People… and those Other People? Those separate, distinct, individual, unique, quirky Human Beings running around out here? They don’t follow My Script.

*mental grenade explodes*

And – because I know what You are thinking – No Buts! TECH wants the details to matter, here, but In Reality? As opposed to Theory? The Details Don’t Matter. It’s My Kid, it’s My Direct Report, My Student, My Aged Parent, My Patient, My Kid’s Teacher, etc. etc. Infinity? Who this Other Person is IRL does Not Matter.

I Am Not the Boss of Anyone – Not Any of These Other People – I Am only the Boss of Myself. [N: Full Stop]

But for this Story – I’m burning daylight, here, loll – let’s zero in on “the blind leading the blind.”

Conceptually? This is Every Human Being, You included, DR. [N: “Thou doth protest..”] Nobody, Living or Dead, knows What The F#ck they are doing!?! And before You try to counter with, “Jesus did! God does!!” or whatever else You use to self-soothe, Imma say to You this: believe what You want. But IMO? It’s a Rookie mistake to answer any IRL question with a Conceptual answer… and air-quotes ‘Religion’ is all about Conceptual answers. [N: and that’s All religions – the details don’t matter in this Context]

My visual for this saying is the 5 Blind Guys around the Elephant. It’s one of My faves, and Why I use it so often when telling a Story.

Here’s My question, though: Why are these 5 Guys “Blind”? Were they born blind? Did they start out being able to see, but got into a 5-car pile-up along the way?? “Inquiring Minds Wanna Know.”

And this could totally turn into a Rabbit Hole, if I let it. [N: Rabbit Holes have the same effect as running on a hamster wheel – faster & faster but never getting anywhere]

So lemme start tweaking, now. This is My Story – I’m the Story-teller – so Imma tell it the way I want to tell it.

In My SB? These 5 Blind Guys aren’t permanently blind; They are all just wearing blindfolds. My blindfold was tied onto My face as a Teensy Tinesy Baby, by My Parents. And as I crawled around – first, in My crib, then in My house, then outside – school, college, work, marriage, having offspring of My Own, etc. etc. – I just used the same dance card I was given. Why recreate the wheel, anyways? “Mother Knows Best” right?

Sure… In Theory.

But when I have an IRL Experience that creates a variance to the Conceptual data in TECH’s Files? That blows up the Invisible Library. I start questioning All the data I’ve acquired… and either I do drugs, become an Alcoholic, live homeless on the street, soothe Myself with having a bunch of Babies – whatever works for Me – I burn up in flames. Never to be seen again.

Now, sure. I can totally go out in a “Blaze of Glory”… but it’s a huge waste of an otherwise Potentially Good Life. I mean, I’m totally guessing, here – I have no Proof to guide Me, IRL – so Imma Wing It: Imma try to manifest the sh#t out of everything I imagine, everything I hope for, dream for, wish for… and find Myself a Pony.

“Riding off into the Sunset…” That saying applies here.

*mental grenade explodes*

. . .

Conner’s Comments: Parents are confused when I say that Kids are the Boss of Themselves. It’s counter-intuitive, but Your Kid is just on loan to You, DR. You don’t air-quotes ‘own’ Them, or Their SB. And if You don’t flip the pancake at the right time – the Kid gives their own tells, that They are “ready” for the Big Leagues – if You don’t loosen the grip on Them? Probably when They hit age 13 they will AKA are gonna disConnect from You. They won’t get to physically leave yet, true, but You’ve already lost the plot. If You think “it just happens” it’s My turn to counter: This is a tell that You are 1) close-minded and 2) engaging in Victim behavior. Stop. STOP It! You still have time, to pull Your nose up before You crash into the earth/crash & burn.

You can only manifest firsthand, for Yourself. Your SB does it, inside Your Own head. Your Kids? You need to air-quotes ‘teach this same lesson to Them,’ first, while They are still listening to You. But that means You gotta learn it first, Mom.