Yes, DR, I’m talking to You. [N: spoken in PASSION’s best Al Pacino voice] **I started writing this Story when the title was still “How Beautiful” lmao**
I went somewhere this morning, to Connect with a bunch of Friendly Strangers. This was the second time I’ve mingled among these particular Folks; PASSION gave a thumbs up to Myself last week – which was My first “Meet Cute” with this Group of Human Beings – but I got lots of dopamine jolts that first time, so naturally I am back for more.
While I was there, distracted by the goings-on – I heard this song.
It totally pinged PASSION, but TECH had difficulty finding the data in the Files – I couldn’t recall the name of the song, the lyrics to the song, or anything… but the reason PASSION was pinged in the hearing of the song? The intensity of the feelings from My Own Memories. [N: I’ve done a lot of singing in My History, and this song was oft-requested, especially for weddings]
I was so moved by the listening to it, I walked up to ask the Lady sitting at the piano – Carol – what the title was.
Carol’s eyes connected with Mine & I see her lips form the words, “How Beautiful.” Because I wasn’t paying attention, I didn’t realize Carol was actually playing the song right at that moment… and when that realization dawned on Me, I smacked PASSION upside the head, reminding Myself to “Pay More Attention, Dude?!” in the Future.
When I returned to the safety of My Sanctuary, PASSION was still “bugged” by hearing the song earlier. In order to satisfy My need to at least sing it one more time IRL, I Googled “how beautiful karaoke” and got a bunch of offerings. The Twila original version is a bit out of My vocal range, so I kept searching until I found a vid in a better key for Me. [N: back in the olden days I could sing in Twila’s key, but I haven’t exercised My singing voice, in Current Day, for more than a hundred years now. So… yeah.
Back to My Story.
I was surprised to discover I couldn’t make it through the entire 4.40 minute song. And I made more than one attempt at it. loll
No, I have the lyrics. And the musical accompaniment. It’s a little rough on My actual vocal instrument, but the reason I had trouble is because as I am singing this song right now, My SB is being triggered… and there’s clearly some residual NEC buried, somewhere, because I am bursting into tears before I get to the End.
I blame the OP who shared Carol’s “personal business” with Me, earlier. I know Why They chose to do so: They were Prioritizing Their interpersonal relationship with Carol. As part of Carol’s Herd, They were giving Carol indirect Support… wanting to make sure I had this relevant Context so as to Influence Me to Not “say anything Stupid” or unfeeling or opposite-of-compassionate while interacting with Carol in this episode. [N: *Spoiler Alert!* there was zero chance of Me doing any of this loll]
Later – after the party was over – I remained near Carol, hovering. I didn’t verbalize My knowledge of Frank, but I could read Carol’s body language and guess that “She already knew I was probably already told about it.” I watched as Carol broke down her music gear. [N: all Performers have this Invisible Work, following a music gig]
While She moved around – this breakdown of stuff was happening in Auto-Pilot, FYI – Carol sensed My presence. Occasionally, Our eyes (Hers & Mines) locked, and We played a friendly little game of “Small Talk” for several minutes.
Then? “Outta Nowhere” – Carol revealed the Money Shot. It was a moment of naked vulnerability. PASSION caught it. [N: PASSION is a People-Watcher: ready to leap tall buildings like Superman, rescue a Kitten from a sewer pipe, be a CPR-trained Friendly Stranger in a fancy restaurant while sitting next to a table where one of the Guests is now choking to death… etc. etc.]
“I’m still getting used to the word, ‘Widow.’”
*mental grenade explodes*
“I get it. But You know what?…” and I Planted this Seed for Carol, the Seed I wanted Someone to plant for Me:
“You don’t have to accept Anybody’s label. There Is No Test.”
And I went on to tell Carol it’s Her Life, She’s the Boss, She’s the only one that gets to decide how She wants to Live Her Own Life, what names to call Herself, etc. etc.
And then… I disappeared. Episode wrapped, curtain is dropped, My job was done here. *Poof!* just like magic.
And that, DR, is how You Plant a f#cking Seed. If I am talking to You? You & I are Connected, right now, in this moment? There’s only one of two things You want from Me. Only two things You need from Me. Everything else is just… details.
PASSION needs Support. -or- TECH needs data.
The trick is knowing which situation We are in right now. Because it’s never gonna be “clear enough.” It’s never gonna be black & white.
. . .
Conner’s Comments: I did actually get CPR-trained; *runs over to look at certificate on My wall* two years ago in August? I did post pics on My Insta. [N: it any events gets pics posted on social media? You know it really got Me] But I hope I never am around Somebody who is choking, because I’m not confident I could help save Them. [N: the difference between Conceptual data & Experience data, again] TECH is bugged to this day by that MadLibs blank… sooner or later, I’ll take CPR class two or three more times. “Three times a charm,” after all.