I’m smarter than You are giving Me credit for. But whatev – there is No Test, so technically I don’t seek credit from You… or Anybody Else, for that matter.
Here’s the missing pieces, DR. The blanks in the MadLibs.
You – from the outside – don’t see the billions of Files inside My Invisible Library. You only ‘see’ what books I “let You check out.” You only acquire the data – about Me, personally, and My IRL Life – that I Consent to reveal to You. And after “getting burned” enough times? I finally figured out – after many proverbial bricks to the head – to quit sticking My fingers into the flame. Or even… to not turn the pilot on. Or sometimes even? To stay outta the f#cking Kitchen.
But all those are details that may or may not apply.. until 1) I Connect with You, and 2) I recognize the Context of the situation.
Here’s a tip, DR: Keep It To Yourself.
This means that when I am out & about Connecting with any Other Person – AKA ‘Random Human Beings’ or any variety or classification – If I am walking down the street & happen to catch a glance of a woman walking towards Me in the other direction… and she has got “an awesome set of tits”… I’m just gonna smile at Her. [N: assuming She Herself consents to that connection by giving Me eye-to-eye contact] Otherwise? I’m gonna look down at the ground as I walk by, a smile on My face because I am imagining burying My face in those jugs – and doing a motorboat – and none of these thoughts hafta be expressed externally. Why? Because first & foremost? “Self- Preservation.”
I only care about Myself, so the last thing I am gonna do is give any OP air-quotes ‘Proof’ that I am checking out Your tits! DUh. [N: I’m not a total idiot]
That’s probably Why I am such “a Happy Person” by a Reasonable Observing Person’s standards: I don’t willingly give Anybody enough rope to hang Me with. So.. Win-Win!
I recall a joke from ages ago, where this old Lady goes to the Doctor. As She is Connecting – PASSION is present, clearly – She says to the Doc, “I’ve been farting this entire time, but You can’t hear it & You can’t smell them!” And the Doctor just smiles – probably while looking down momentarily – and He leans over and does his Doctor-y magic… and all of sudden? The Lady is like, “WTF is that horrible smell?!”
Because the Doc just did something to Her sinuses that were obviously clogged or something – the Lady’s own words gave the Doc a clue as to “where to look” – and then the Doc says, “Now, let’s take a look at Your hearing…”
. . .
And that’s why this joke is so funny to Me loll. Even recalling it now – as I type this Story for You – it brings a smile to My face.
But the Money Shot? It wasn’t what the old Lady was saying or doing… it was what the Doctor Himself was saying & doing.
Could He have “shamed” Her? Yes. But… He chose to do something else.
Could He have lost his patience, and just did his Doctor “wham bam thank You Ma’am” stuff on her? Yes. But… he chose to do something else.
Could He have tried to Boss her, critique her behavior, saying something like “You shouldn’t just fart whenever You want… what will Other People think/say?” Sure He could have… but he didn’t.
Here’s the point I’m trying to make: I always have a choice. I always have options in how I respond. The external World will try its damnedest to keep Me agitated, triggered, upset, and traumatized – and for awhile? I’ll jump into a Rabbit Hole so I can smooth off the rough edges – but after I’ve expressed out all these feelings? Imma re-engage… and tweak My Own process.
One last thing: I am known the World over by My smile. It’s the first thing People see, when We Connect loll.