If I invite You over to My House & You light up Your vape thing – all the while insisting “it’s not really smoking!” – I will never invite You back.
But that’s just Me.
If I invite You over to My House & You make a joke at My expense? I will immediately go silent, then I will ask You to leave.
But that’s just Me.
If You sit down to the meal I have so painstakingly prepared – checking for any possible allergies, asking ahead of time for Your preferences, etc. etc. – and instead of having IRL conversation with Me, You whip out Your cellphone and start mindlessly scrolling? I will read You the riot act, and tell You to put it away. [N: final warning]
But that’s just Me.
If You shame Me, or guilt Me, or actively try to embarrass Me – in Public or in Private – I will disConnect from You. And this drawbridge will forever remain shut, barring You from ever returning.
But that’s just Me.
I’m sure there’s a million other things that pi$$ Me off, but TBH it’s hard for Me to imagine them. Why? Because I never let any Other Person get so far down that particular road. I’m not just waiting for the other shoe to drop; if You even reach for it, like You intend to take it off and beat Me over the head with it? Imma stop You right there, @$$hole.
I am extremely, ExtrEMEly protective of My Herd. I will not allow any wolves in sheep’s clothing around to start picking any of Them off, Myself included.
And don’t think “We’ve been Friends for years!” is gonna sway Me. I do it very infrequently, but a “personal boundary” violation – AKA the first time’s always “free” but You won’t get a second chance to actively & ongoingly screw Me over – warrants disConnection in My World. And You won’t really know it’s happening until it’s done, because I’m not going to scream/fight/yell.
I’m just gonna stop being vulnerable with You. I’m just gonna stop seeking You as My Support Person. Every question is gonna be answered “Fine, Everything’s Fine” and “oh, nothing much – same ole’ same ole” and I will do it with a Cheshire Cat Smile on My face as I slowly vanish before Your eyes.
- Owe. You. Nothing.
So take Your best shot! And then?
It’s My turn.
. . .
Conner’s Comments: disConnecting from Someone I Trust and I Love is Not easy. Or fun. In fact, PASSION finds it very devastating. But I must protect Myself, and My Life. I already have IRL Experience of Loved Ones – Human Beings I Trusted – make Me wish I was dead. I will never, ever go back into that particular Rabbit Hole. Never.